EXTREME SCUFFLE
BRINGING TENTACLES TO A FISTFIGHT IS A SURE WAY TO WHOOP SOME ASS!!! YOU'RE OUTNUMBERED!!! OUTMUSCLED!!! OUT-FILL-IN-THE-F***ING BLANK!!!! YOUR FISTS MEAN NOTHING HERE, HUMAN!!! NOTHING!!! YOU'RE AS FRAGILE AS A CORAL REEF!!! BRING YOUR BEST FIGHTER AND WATCH THEM GET DROP-KICKED WITH EASE!!! WOOOOOOO!!!!! LOOK MA, NO HANDS!!!!
Made For
biking
Great For
beasting
running
LOOK GOOD, BIKE GOODR.
1 NO SLIP
WE USE A SPECIAL GRIP COATING AND TEMPLE GRIPS TO CONSTRUCT OUR FRAME TO HELP ELIMINATE SLIPPAGE WHEN YOUR LAVA-INDUCED SWEAT POPS WHILE VOLCANO SURFING.
2 NO BOUNCE
OUR FRAME IS FITTED AND LIGHTWEIGHT, WITH A REMOVABLE NOSE-PIECE AND TWO SIZING OPTIONS TO PREVENT BOUNCING WHEN YOU LAND ON YOUR MOTORCYCLE SEAT AFTER DIVING OUT OF A HELICOPTER.
3 ANTI-FOG
EXTREMELY EFFECTIVE ANTI-FOG COATING PREVENTS THE INSIDE OF THIS EXTREME WRAPAROUND LENS FROM FOGGING EVEN WITH THE EXTREMEST SWEAT.
4 ALL POLARIZED
GLARE-REDUCING, POLARIZED LENSES AND UV400 PROTECTION THAT BLOCKS THOSE HARMFUL UVA AND UVB RAYS.
5 ALL EXTREME
YOU MIGHT BE AN EXTREME ATHLETE, YOU MIGHT BE A PRETTY AVERAGE ATHLETE WHO IS EXTREMELY DELUSIONAL. BOTH EXTREMELY EXTREME EXTREMISTS YEAHHHHHAHARGHHHHHWOOOOOHOOOOOOO
INTRODUCING LOOK MA, NO HANDS
AN EXTREME POEM TO AN EXTREME MOTHER.
READ OUR LOOK MA, NO HANDS! ORIGIN STORY
